Monday, May 18, 2015


       FINDING YOUR GIFT
      I believe my  last blog (which was way too long ago) was about celebrating the 60th anniversary of Albany Civic Theatre. It was indeed a very special time for me and the occasion was also quite a reminder for me.  It reminded me of all the many friends I had performed with all those years ago.  And, it reminded me of the joy I had felt while following the dream I had chosen for myself upon my graduation from college in 1962.  At that point in one's life I believed that he or she should have decided upon his or her future.
I furthermore had decided that everyone was born with a gift and it was his or her obligation to find what that gift was and to pursue it.   I was one who was lucky enough to know that I was meant to perform, whether it be on stage or screen.  But in more practical terms, I would need a job.....so I graduated with a teaching degree in English and in Speech and followed it with a Masters degree (which eventually turned into a Ph.D).  But always my dream was to be an 'actress'.  So shortly after my first child, Karen,  was born in 1964 I began performing on the stage at Albany Civic Theatre.
Life for me soon became a whirlwind of shows performed at various theatres in what is known as the tri-cities....meaning---Albany, Troy, Schenectady, Guilderland, Slingerlands, Saratoga, and various other venues in  the northeast of New York state.  It was a ball for me and for my husband, Barry, who loved every second of it as much as all the performers did. He ran the lights, the box office, became buddies with the set designer and as a result built sets for every show and generally found enjoyment in every area of theatre production.
So while I got to do 'my thing'  onstage, the rest of the family was able to find 'their thing' and enjoy it as much as I was enjoying 'my thing'.
Which brings me back to 'finding one's gift', which as  a teacher, a parent and a therapist (which is what I did with the Ph.D in Psychology) I would always help my students,etc. to "find their gift"-------something each one of you, my readers, also possess.  With proper analysis you can find that one special characteristic that sets you apart.  Think about it, and let it simmer in your brain for a bit, because if you find the gift that is special to you and engage it, you can create a whole new world for yourself, as well as for your family and all the people that are touched by you.  So next time you have some 'quiet time', focus on what sets you apart and begin to execute whatever it  is.  The riches it can provide will make a difference not only in your own life, but in the lives of your family, friends,etc.  And....it's never too late!
Hope you enjoyed this session....I'll plan to get back to you much sooner with my next blog!!
Respectfully submitted
Mimi Scott, Ph.D
tel: 212 721 2979   mscott13@aol.com
     




FINDING YOUR GIFT
      I believe my  last blog (which was way too long ago) was about celebrating the 60th anniversary of Albany Civic Theatre. It was indeed a very special time for me and the occasion was also quite a reminder for me.  It reminded me of all the many friends I had performed with all those years ago.  And, it reminded me of the joy I had felt while following the dream I had chosen for myself upon my graduation from college in 1962.  At that point in one's life I believed that he or she should have decided upon his or her future.
I furthermore had decided that everyone was born with a gift and it was his or her obligation to find what that gift was and to pursue it.   I was one who was lucky enough to know that I was meant to perform, whether it be on stage or screen.  But in more practical terms, I would need a job.....so I graduated with a teaching degree in English and in Speech and followed it with a Masters degree (which eventually turned into a Ph.D).  But always my dream was to be an 'actress'.  So shortly after my first child, Karen,  was born in 1964 I began performing on the stage at Albany Civic Theatre.
Life for me soon became a whirlwind of shows performed at various theatres in what is known as the tri-cities....meaning---Albany, Troy, Schenectady, Guilderland, Slingerlands, Saratoga, and various other venues in  the northeast of New York state.  It was a ball for me and for my husband, Barry, who loved every second of it as much as all the performers did. He ran the lights, the box office, became buddies with the set designer and as a result built sets for every show and generally found enjoyment in every area of theatre production.
So while I got to do 'my thing'  onstage, the rest of the family was able to find 'their thing' and enjoy it as much as I was enjoying 'my thing'.
Which brings me back to 'finding one's gift', which as  a teacher, a parent and a therapist (which is what I did with the Ph.D in Psychology) I would always help my students,etc. to "find their gift"-------something each one of you, my readers, also possess.  With proper analysis you can find that one special characteristic that sets you apart.  Think about it, and let it simmer in your brain for a bit, because if you find the gift that is special to you and engage it, you can create a whole new world for yourself, as well as for your family and all the people that are touched by you.  So next time you have some 'quiet time', focus on what sets you apart and begin to execute whatever it  is.  The riches it can provide will make a difference not only in your own life, but in the lives of your family, friends,etc.  And....it's never too late!
Hope you enjoyed this session....I'll plan to get back to you much sooner with my next blog!!
Respectfully submitted
Mimi Scott, Ph.D
tel: 212 721 2979   mscott13@aol.com
     




FINDING YOUR GIFT
      I believe my  last blog (which was way too long ago) was about celebrating the 60th anniversary of Albany Civic Theatre. It was indeed a very special time for me and the occasion was also quite a reminder for me.  It reminded me of all the many friends I had performed with all those years ago.  And, it reminded me of the joy I had felt while following the dream I had chosen for myself upon my graduation from college in 1962.  At that point in one's life I believed that he or she should have decided upon his or her future.
I furthermore had decided that everyone was born with a gift and it was his or her obligation to find what that gift was and to pursue it.   I was one who was lucky enough to know that I was meant to perform, whether it be on stage or screen.  But in more practical terms, I would need a job.....so I graduated with a teaching degree in English and in Speech and followed it with a Masters degree (which eventually turned into a Ph.D).  But always my dream was to be an 'actress'.  So shortly after my first child, Karen,  was born in 1964 I began performing on the stage at Albany Civic Theatre.
Life for me soon became a whirlwind of shows performed at various theatres in what is known as the tri-cities....meaning---Albany, Troy, Schenectady, Guilderland, Slingerlands, Saratoga, and various other venues in  the northeast of New York state.  It was a ball for me and for my husband, Barry, who loved every second of it as much as all the performers did. He ran the lights, the box office, became buddies with the set designer and as a result built sets for every show and generally found enjoyment in every area of theatre production.
So while I got to do 'my thing'  onstage, the rest of the family was able to find 'their thing' and enjoy it as much as I was enjoying 'my thing'.
Which brings me back to 'finding one's gift', which as  a teacher, a parent and a therapist (which is what I did with the Ph.D in Psychology) I would always help my students,etc. to "find their gift"-------something each one of you, my readers, also possess.  With proper analysis you can find that one special characteristic that sets you apart.  Think about it, and let it simmer in your brain for a bit, because if you find the gift that is special to you and engage it, you can create a whole new world for yourself, as well as for your family and all the people that are touched by you.  So next time you have some 'quiet time', focus on what sets you apart and begin to execute whatever it  is.  The riches it can provide will make a difference not only in your own life, but in the lives of your family, friends,etc.  And....it's never too late!
Hope you enjoyed this session....I'll plan to get back to you much sooner with my next blog!!
Respectfully submitted
Mimi Scott, Ph.D
tel: 212 721 2979   mscott13@aol.com
     




FINDING YOUR GIFT
      I believe my  last blog (which was way too long ago) was about celebrating the 60th anniversary of Albany Civic Theatre. It was indeed a very special time for me and the occasion was also quite a reminder for me.  It reminded me of all the many friends I had performed with all those years ago.  And, it reminded me of the joy I had felt while following the dream I had chosen for myself upon my graduation from college in 1962.  At that point in one's life I believed that he or she should have decided upon his or her future.
I furthermore had decided that everyone was born with a gift and it was his or her obligation to find what that gift was and to pursue it.   I was one who was lucky enough to know that I was meant to perform, whether it be on stage or screen.  But in more practical terms, I would need a job.....so I graduated with a teaching degree in English and in Speech and followed it with a Masters degree (which eventually turned into a Ph.D).  But always my dream was to be an 'actress'.  So shortly after my first child, Karen,  was born in 1964 I began performing on the stage at Albany Civic Theatre.
Life for me soon became a whirlwind of shows performed at various theatres in what is known as the tri-cities....meaning---Albany, Troy, Schenectady, Guilderland, Slingerlands, Saratoga, and various other venues in  the northeast of New York state.  It was a ball for me and for my husband, Barry, who loved every second of it as much as all the performers did. He ran the lights, the box office, became buddies with the set designer and as a result built sets for every show and generally found enjoyment in every area of theatre production.
So while I got to do 'my thing'  onstage, the rest of the family was able to find 'their thing' and enjoy it as much as I was enjoying 'my thing'.
Which brings me back to 'finding one's gift', which as  a teacher, a parent and a therapist (which is what I did with the Ph.D in Psychology) I would always help my students,etc. to "find their gift"-------something each one of you, my readers, also possess.  With proper analysis you can find that one special characteristic that sets you apart.  Think about it, and let it simmer in your brain for a bit, because if you find the gift that is special to you and engage it, you can create a whole new world for yourself, as well as for your family and all the people that are touched by you.  So next time you have some 'quiet time', focus on what sets you apart and begin to execute whatever it  is.  The riches it can provide will make a difference not only in your own life, but in the lives of your family, friends,etc.  And....it's never too late!
Hope you enjoyed this session....I'll plan to get back to you much sooner with my next blog!!
Respectfully submitted
Mimi Scott, Ph.D
tel: 212 721 2979   mscott13@aol.com
     




FINDING YOUR GIFT
      I believe my  last blog (which was way too long ago) was about celebrating the 60th anniversary of Albany Civic Theatre. It was indeed a very special time for me and the occasion was also quite a reminder for me.  It reminded me of all the many friends I had performed with all those years ago.  And, it reminded me of the joy I had felt while following the dream I had chosen for myself upon my graduation from college in 1962.  At that point in one's life I believed that he or she should have decided upon his or her future.
I furthermore had decided that everyone was born with a gift and it was his or her obligation to find what that gift was and to pursue it.   I was one who was lucky enough to know that I was meant to perform, whether it be on stage or screen.  But in more practical terms, I would need a job.....so I graduated with a teaching degree in English and in Speech and followed it with a Masters degree (which eventually turned into a Ph.D).  But always my dream was to be an 'actress'.  So shortly after my first child, Karen,  was born in 1964 I began performing on the stage at Albany Civic Theatre.
Life for me soon became a whirlwind of shows performed at various theatres in what is known as the tri-cities....meaning---Albany, Troy, Schenectady, Guilderland, Slingerlands, Saratoga, and various other venues in  the northeast of New York state.  It was a ball for me and for my husband, Barry, who loved every second of it as much as all the performers did. He ran the lights, the box office, became buddies with the set designer and as a result built sets for every show and generally found enjoyment in every area of theatre production.
So while I got to do 'my thing'  onstage, the rest of the family was able to find 'their thing' and enjoy it as much as I was enjoying 'my thing'.
Which brings me back to 'finding one's gift', which as  a teacher, a parent and a therapist (which is what I did with the Ph.D in Psychology) I would always help my students,etc. to "find their gift"-------something each one of you, my readers, also possess.  With proper analysis you can find that one special characteristic that sets you apart.  Think about it, and let it simmer in your brain for a bit, because if you find the gift that is special to you and engage it, you can create a whole new world for yourself, as well as for your family and all the people that are touched by you.  So next time you have some 'quiet time', focus on what sets you apart and begin to execute whatever it  is.  The riches it can provide will make a difference not only in your own life, but in the lives of your family, friends,etc.  And....it's never too late!
Hope you enjoyed this session....I'll plan to get back to you much sooner with my next blog!!
Respectfully submitted
Mimi Scott, Ph.D
tel: 212 721 2979   mscott13@aol.com

Sunday, February 15, 2015

Something to Celebrate!!

I'm on the road again!!! Albany Civic Theatre, where I virtually started my career, is celebrating it's 6oth Anniversay February 28th-March 1st at the converted firehouse on Second Avenue in Albany where it all began.  I started performing with them right out of college and it became my second home for the next 30 years while I married; raised kids; spent two years shooting commercials in New York City, and all too soon lost my beloved Barry.  He and I spoke of how blessed we were all through those years as we sang and danced (at least I did) and laughed our hearts out with the gang at ACT.  The group there who made it all work were so close to us that we couldn't imagine life without them. The wit they all possessed, especially the gays which most of the fellas were, could not be beaten.  But sadly most of those original talents are not with us anymore....it's hard getting older.

We would get up from the dinner table every night and get in the car and head down to the theatre for rehearsal or performance. There were some plays, but for the most part (and this is where I always could be found) it was all musicals. And I was either the first or second lead in every one of them!!  If you can remember all the classic Broadway musicals, we did them all (well, most of them anyway).

We always had a  'college girl'  (the name for what is now called a 'nanny') who lived with us and took care of the kids. (That's how dinner got cleaned up---I did prepare it however.) We all brought the kids with us to final dress rehearsals, and before you knew it they were working on sets, costumes and often performing in the shows as well. Karen, my daughter, was in several, while Jeffrey was busy performing his magic all around town. And the adults loved to have them around as they could pass on all their stories to the kids. A lot of those stories were passed on right at our dinner table as a few very special guys from 'the theatre' became like family and as such they had many a dinner with us...two names---Nicky and Bob---come right to mind.  Unfortunately they are now gone as well.

As I mentioned, Barry and I felt blessed that our kids were able to grow up with so much laughter and music.  I really didn't 'play' piano, but it never sat there quietly.  We entertained weekly it seemed.  I remember one Halloween when I made 'pumpkin soup' and several of them dressed up, and yet somehow at midnight everyone left abruptly having argued with one another. When we closed the door Barry and I stood there looking at each other and just shrugged.  The gang were truly a 'family' with the love and the 'hate' (fights,etc.) that were certainly the qualities of families.

And they were all alcoholics!! (Not me however).  Religiously after each show we would go across the street to the Garden Grill and celebrate.  It was basically a haunt of 'hard hats' but normally they all dealt with us taking it over.  While Barry sat at the bar, I was standing by the juke box nightly singing and dancing.

And the theatre itself which we are celebrating in two weeks was simply charming.  It sat something like 90 and the circular staircase remained after conversion as the backstage entrance and exit...I remember runninng down them one night, sure that I was late for an entrance and finding myself onstage with a cast that just looked askance at me as I was not supposed to be there!!

There is not enough room here to enumerate all the happenings over the years that made our time there so very special. But what I just wanted to get across was just how lucky Barry and I, as well as Karen and Jeff, were to have ACT as such a special part of our world for so many years.  So it is with a great deal of pleasure I will be performing "Adelaide's Lament" from Guys and Dolls (which was perhaps my favorite role) onstage at ACT for their 60th anniversary.  Any and all of you who may be interested in coming to this occasion please call me at 212 721-2979 or 917 846-2449 and I'll give you all the details.

Hope you enjoyed this session

Respectfully yours
Mimi Scott, Ph.D
212 721-2979
www.sessionswithdrmimiscott.blogspot.com




Sunday, October 19, 2014

A MAJOR LOSS

On September 23rd I lost my beloved friend Guido.  I still cannot function.  I've lost both parents; my husband of 30 years, Barry; and my only sibling, my brother Hersch, last year also in September. But this one was different. For all other losses I did what I could to obey Jewish law because I knew it was what I was supposed to do.  This time I more than sat Shiva.  Shiva means 7.  But I'm now 'sitting' way more than seven days.  I just cannot really move out of the house and go anyplace....my only outings are my walks with the dogs.  Guido is on my mind 24/7. Mainly because it 'came out of the blue'.

A call came to me from Columbia Presbyterian Hospital telling me that they had Richard Guido there who had listed me as his 'emergency contact', and that I should get to the hospital as soon as possible as he was very very sick.  They would not tell me what was wrong with Guido, just that I should get there ASAP.  Within five minutes Elda, my own beloved caretaker, returned from doing some errands and in no time we were ready to leave the apartment.  Luckily we got a cab right away and as soon as we got into it, I turned to Elda and said I had to call Steve who was also a part of the Guido/Mimi family.

In 1993, the first year I had moved to New York City following the death of my beloved Barry, I had immediately thrown myself into the theatre world by auditioning for some showcases. Then around February I had seen a notice in Backstage advertising positions for a summer theatre known as Pioneer Playhouse in Danville, Kentucky.  I had never really done summer theatre prior to that time, and I thought it would be a blast to do.  So I auditioned,  and this older fellow who called himself  'the Colonel' cast me to play all the age appropriate roles for them for the summer.  I would be there from the beginning of June through Labor Day. I told the Colonel I could driive if anyone would need a ride and he told me right away to call Richard Guido who had been there the summer before and could 'show me the ropes'.

After several calls Guido finally called me back and said that he and a girl named Marilyn could go with me. As we were needed right after Memorial Day weekend they could meet me at my lakehouse outside of Albany during the weekend and we could all go from there together.  My family were with me to pick these two up at the bus station and to check out what kind of people I would be spending the next 3 months with.  I didn't know it at the time, but my daughter Karen told me they actually had reservations about my going away for the first time since my husband had died, and for 3 months!  However as soon as Guido and Marilyn came to the lakehouse and we all started talking, Karen recently told me that she immediately relaxed feeling that "if this guy is gonna be with her, she'll be fine! Guido in turn never forgot Karen's twins, Koti and Jazz (now 23)  who were 2 at the time and crying all day because they couldn't find their 'party shoes'!! Guido was part of our family from that day on.  He was there for every holiday dinner and family gathering.

Guido was probably the most comfortable person any of us had ever known.  Absolutely no pretensions about him. He simply was who he was, and you loved him right off the bat. He was a 'big guy' and very self conscious about his weight, forever trying one fad diet after another.  Not an intellectual by any means, Guido nevertheless little by little revealed himself as one of the smartest people I have ever known.  He simply 'understood' people and all of us wanted to be around Guido as much as we could.

When summer 'camp' (as I thought of it) came to a close Guido was in between apartments in New York.  So he stayed with me in my studio apartment.  First however I collected our little familly from Pioneer Playhouse and brought them to the lakehouse for a few days. Guido and I had just returned to my New York apartment when I got the call that my daughter-in-law Lisa was in labor and we should come up if we wanted to see the new baby right away. We always talked about getting dressed and turning right around to go right back to Albany to be there for my granddaughter Jordan's birth.

And when we returned to New York, I continued to bring our whole little family from Kentucky (Guido, Steve, Victoria and Christopher) over to my apartment as much as possiible so I did indeed have a family in New York to love and cherish.  And Guido especailly  became very close to all my grandchildren as they grew older.  He was always there to chuckle at everything they all said and did. And he came right along with me to recitals and musical performances all the time.  But mostly, Guido worked at Lincoln Center as a 'Super' with the Metropolitan Opera (and of course he made friends with all the 'stars' over there). As the Met is located right across the street from where I live, Guido would stop by almost daily with a call first to say "I'm downstairs....do you need anything? Indeed he would stay here on Sundays to give Elda a break and as I write this I can feel him in the livingroom watching whatever football game was on.

I believe it is common to suffer, sometimes more painfully then others, when a family member passes and thank the good Lord I have barely lost friends, but this loss has simply devstated me. I thank you all for indulging me by reading this as I think in the end it has lifted my spirit significantly to write this.

Respectfully yours,

Mimi Scott, Ph.D
 212 721-2989
917 846-2449
mscott13@aol.com
www.sessionswithdrmimiscott.blogspot.com

Sunday, August 17, 2014

THE IMPORTANCE OF LAUGHTER

          On everyone's mind since the passing of Robin Williams is the subject of laughter.  We all loved him because he brought so much laughter into our lives.  And that laughter created by him was covering so very much pain.  Which seems to be a very common dynamic for comedians.  Time and again we learn that those who make us laugh the most are actually suffering from so very much. So at this time I'd llike to express my thanks to this comic genius for all the hilarious moments he brought into my life.

           That said I'd like to mention to you all that a show that is being touted as 'hilarious' is coming soon to Stage 72 at the Triad Theatre here in New York City from October 10th through December 31st.  Called MY  SON THE WAITER, A JEWISH TRAGEDY, and written and starring Brad Zimmerman, early reviews have called it hilarious adding that the humor is universal. 

          The Triad is on West  72nd street between Broadway and Columbus, and the shows will take place Mondays at 7:00pm; Friday evenings at 7:00pm; Saturdays at  2:00pm and 7:00pm, and Sundays at 2:00pm. New Years Eve there will be performances at 7 & 9PM.  In addition to the ticket prices which are $45.00 for a general ticket; $60.00 for an orchestra seat and $99.00 for a VIP ticket, there is a two drink minimum required.

           My good friend Dana Matthow is producing this one (you may remember him as the producer of the show that gave me a start here in NYC---Grandma Sylvia's Funeral).  Indeed, if you use the code MIMI for best seats the cost is $37.50 plus the two drink minimum. 

           For box Office the number is 212 264-1788   For groups of 12 or more 1-888-264-1788
                                                 PlayhouseInfo.com

Hope you all get a chance to see this one....we need all the laughter we can get in this life!!

Respectfully submitted 
Mimi Scott, Ph.D
212 721-2979






Sunday, June 8, 2014

MY NEWEST ADVENTURE


        It's been quite awhile, but sometimes one has to take a break to see what really is going on.  I took several months off to find out what was next.  Then while watching the show Nashville with everyone performing in an auditorium in Nashville itself, I realized that's what I want to do......perform with a guitar!!
The only problem is I don't really play the guitar.  I fooled around with one almost 50 years ago, but I was far from knowing how to really play.  But those of you who know me know that nothing stops me.  I made the decisiion to get a guitar and to write songs and play them.  When I would have enough in my repertoire I would have a little show called "Granny Rocks!!".

           So that is what I have been working on for the last few weeks. I have written two songs----one called Nobody Talks Anymore, and another called Slowin' Down.  My teacher however is also giving me classic songs to learn  in order to get started.  I play 'Slowin Down" like a pro, but parts of "Love me Tender" are really driving me nuts!!
         I thought I'd tell you about all this so you'll understand why you haven't heard from me. I thought all this would be a 'piece of cake'------It isn't!!  But I tell myself every single day--"you can d it! In a  day filled with working out on machines; swimming; walking dogs; and dealing with all that's on the computer, I am practising my guitar.  I just hope I don't smash it one day out of frustration...I never had to bend my fingers around anything like this.....but I find of course that with practise it actually works!
       So let's just see if I can conquer this instrument which tucks under my boob in order to allow me to see all the notes.  So far the machine is still here and so are my boobs and I've actually written words and music to one song and am singing with it!!
       Long story short I am a work in progress and it will take time before I can entertain you all.  But please stay turned because I am determined that it will happen.  And understand if I am not readilly available these days.....I am simply busy "playing my guitar"!!
























































































Sunday, February 23, 2014

COMING OUT FROM UNDER....

     Today it's as though Spring has arrived, so naturally we feel like a new person.  It's simply amazing the way the weather plays such an important role in our lives.  People here in the north east have definitely been 'under the weather' for the last few months. (interesting choice of words is it not?). "Under the weather' obviously means that we are down because of weather.  When one wakes up to 'gray' instead of blue and sunny it simply doesn't invoke the same happy spirit.  We often just want to pull the covers back over our collective heads!

     Aside from the dreariness of the dark weather is the extra worry of how one is to get around in the gray mess---which includes both rain and snow.  The same energy needed to attack our work day is simply not there when the color outside our windows is Gray!!

    Of course we begin the season captivated by the first snow fall and anxious to look out the window and see the trees all white and the wonderland that is the landscape we first lay our eyes upon.  But of course that wears off and it all soon becomes gray, and gray and more gray.  Then we reach that wonderful moment when....Ah ha...it looks and feels a little bit like Spring!  We relish the idea of getting outside and walking.  We can't wait to breathe in the fresh air.  We actually want to 'get to work'.

    So why not give resolutions a new shot.  I made a bunch for the New Year, but they are of course still hanging on my door to remind me every minute of what I haven't done that I promised myself I would. So why not give the arrival (at least the partial arrival) of Spring a second chance for our own renewal.  Certainly we can allow ourselves to take more time outside---longer walks, etc.  And of course there's always shopping that we can take this time to do.  Tell you the truth even though it's too early to put away the boots just yet, we could still begin to focus on straightening up our rooms, and attacking our desks with new zest.

     My Florida readers are probably not 'feeling it' with me, but it's never a bad idea for everyone else to get up the ole energy by thinking this way and pretending the sky is so very blue, and grass is becoming green and there are hints of color all around. Time to start planning for the Spring and getting the place ready to open up and let the Spring come in....all the way to out hearts......Enjoy, and welcome the new 'light'.

     Hope some of you have enjoyed this session.  It's been awhile.  I guess I've been somewhat 'under the weather', so here's my stab at a new 'beginning'!

    Respectfully submitted,
    Mimi Scott, Ph.D
    Mscott13@aol.com
   www.drmimiscott.com
   

Friday, November 29, 2013

'Tis the season to be jolly...' But what if you're not??

       We are brought up with excitement about the Holiday season.  But what if-- 'lo and behold'-- we just are not?. What if we become, God forbid, depressed??? Unfortunately this is not an uncommon occurence.  Everyone knows about the Jewish kids that grow up jealous of their Christian neighbors and all the glorious presents they seem to get for Christmas.  Even with a gift for each of the 8 days of Chanukah, it never seems to add up to all the gifts their Christian friends receive.  But this  rarely becomes a serious situation.

       What is serious is when a loved one has died during the Holiday season.  Each year those affected are reminded of the sadness of their loss.  It is hard to laugh and 'be happy' when you're caught up with thoughts of a parent; a sibling, or a mate who left at this time of year. Then of course there are all the family gatherings that take place beginning with Thanksgiving.  So many find it difficult to be around family.  Usually it is because they feel that they have not met the expectations that 'the family' had for them.  Often there are underlying unresolved issues between family members that may be difficult to set aside at these gatherings. How sad...

       As this is a very frequent situation which therapists face from clients at this time of year I thought perhaps it would be helpful to offer ways in which to deal with your own possible sadness.  First know---you are not alone.  The time of year itself can bring about sadness.  It gets dark earlier; it's colder and all the bravado of the season only sets people who aren't feeling particularly 'happy'-- back.  What to do??

      Take stock of yourself.  Of course there are going to be things about which you are unsettled and disappointed.  When those thoughts take over...face them and then ask yourself what things you are happy about.  What achievements, small as they may be, have made you proud.  And most importantly who is in your life that you consider a 'friend'?  Who is there for you when you need someone?  Think about these people when you may not be around them. Tell your family about them.  Just thoughts of these people and the fun you may have had together can put a smile on your face. And if by chance you can't find anyone to fit this bill, make an assessment.  What kind of friend have you been?  Have you put yourself out for anyone and been there for them?  In order to have a friend you have to be one. This may be a good New Year's resolution.

    Finally, as much as you may not want to partake in the joviality of the season...force yourself to.  Make dinner plans with the friends you do have. (You may even call up one of your relatives who hold themselves apart and make a date with them!)  Dress up and put on make up. Go to some good, and 'up',  kind of movies.  Put on music in your home...the holiday TV stations can be great,  Lastly, reach out to everyone and wish them happiness at this time of year!  Ironically, it's the best way to lift your own spirits.

   Or...if you are a blogger take a minute and wish all your readers the very best the season and life has to offer.  Happy Holidays everone!

Respectfully submitted
Mimi Scott, Ph.d, LCSW
mscott13@aol.com
212 721-2979
917 846-2449