Sunday, October 19, 2014

A MAJOR LOSS

On September 23rd I lost my beloved friend Guido.  I still cannot function.  I've lost both parents; my husband of 30 years, Barry; and my only sibling, my brother Hersch, last year also in September. But this one was different. For all other losses I did what I could to obey Jewish law because I knew it was what I was supposed to do.  This time I more than sat Shiva.  Shiva means 7.  But I'm now 'sitting' way more than seven days.  I just cannot really move out of the house and go anyplace....my only outings are my walks with the dogs.  Guido is on my mind 24/7. Mainly because it 'came out of the blue'.

A call came to me from Columbia Presbyterian Hospital telling me that they had Richard Guido there who had listed me as his 'emergency contact', and that I should get to the hospital as soon as possible as he was very very sick.  They would not tell me what was wrong with Guido, just that I should get there ASAP.  Within five minutes Elda, my own beloved caretaker, returned from doing some errands and in no time we were ready to leave the apartment.  Luckily we got a cab right away and as soon as we got into it, I turned to Elda and said I had to call Steve who was also a part of the Guido/Mimi family.

In 1993, the first year I had moved to New York City following the death of my beloved Barry, I had immediately thrown myself into the theatre world by auditioning for some showcases. Then around February I had seen a notice in Backstage advertising positions for a summer theatre known as Pioneer Playhouse in Danville, Kentucky.  I had never really done summer theatre prior to that time, and I thought it would be a blast to do.  So I auditioned,  and this older fellow who called himself  'the Colonel' cast me to play all the age appropriate roles for them for the summer.  I would be there from the beginning of June through Labor Day. I told the Colonel I could driive if anyone would need a ride and he told me right away to call Richard Guido who had been there the summer before and could 'show me the ropes'.

After several calls Guido finally called me back and said that he and a girl named Marilyn could go with me. As we were needed right after Memorial Day weekend they could meet me at my lakehouse outside of Albany during the weekend and we could all go from there together.  My family were with me to pick these two up at the bus station and to check out what kind of people I would be spending the next 3 months with.  I didn't know it at the time, but my daughter Karen told me they actually had reservations about my going away for the first time since my husband had died, and for 3 months!  However as soon as Guido and Marilyn came to the lakehouse and we all started talking, Karen recently told me that she immediately relaxed feeling that "if this guy is gonna be with her, she'll be fine! Guido in turn never forgot Karen's twins, Koti and Jazz (now 23)  who were 2 at the time and crying all day because they couldn't find their 'party shoes'!! Guido was part of our family from that day on.  He was there for every holiday dinner and family gathering.

Guido was probably the most comfortable person any of us had ever known.  Absolutely no pretensions about him. He simply was who he was, and you loved him right off the bat. He was a 'big guy' and very self conscious about his weight, forever trying one fad diet after another.  Not an intellectual by any means, Guido nevertheless little by little revealed himself as one of the smartest people I have ever known.  He simply 'understood' people and all of us wanted to be around Guido as much as we could.

When summer 'camp' (as I thought of it) came to a close Guido was in between apartments in New York.  So he stayed with me in my studio apartment.  First however I collected our little familly from Pioneer Playhouse and brought them to the lakehouse for a few days. Guido and I had just returned to my New York apartment when I got the call that my daughter-in-law Lisa was in labor and we should come up if we wanted to see the new baby right away. We always talked about getting dressed and turning right around to go right back to Albany to be there for my granddaughter Jordan's birth.

And when we returned to New York, I continued to bring our whole little family from Kentucky (Guido, Steve, Victoria and Christopher) over to my apartment as much as possiible so I did indeed have a family in New York to love and cherish.  And Guido especailly  became very close to all my grandchildren as they grew older.  He was always there to chuckle at everything they all said and did. And he came right along with me to recitals and musical performances all the time.  But mostly, Guido worked at Lincoln Center as a 'Super' with the Metropolitan Opera (and of course he made friends with all the 'stars' over there). As the Met is located right across the street from where I live, Guido would stop by almost daily with a call first to say "I'm downstairs....do you need anything? Indeed he would stay here on Sundays to give Elda a break and as I write this I can feel him in the livingroom watching whatever football game was on.

I believe it is common to suffer, sometimes more painfully then others, when a family member passes and thank the good Lord I have barely lost friends, but this loss has simply devstated me. I thank you all for indulging me by reading this as I think in the end it has lifted my spirit significantly to write this.

Respectfully yours,

Mimi Scott, Ph.D
 212 721-2989
917 846-2449
mscott13@aol.com
www.sessionswithdrmimiscott.blogspot.com